Posts Tagged ‘Nail Polish’

Kickin’ Ass & Takin’ Names

In Shakespeare’s play, Romeo and Juliet, Juliet Capulet says, “What’s in a name? / That which we call a rose / By any other name would smell as sweet”. But is it really true? I disagree. What you name something or someone definitely matters. Just ask Apple. No, not the fruit or the computer company. Apple’s the daughter of the boring, harmless-as-flies celeb couple Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow. Yawn.

Grenade. Seriously? Yeah. We were friends at summer camp, and we made quite the hilarious pair. She was this macho, big-boned girl who was nice enough but who also didn’t tolerate any crap. Everyone just knew not to mess with her. And there I was, this small, bony, happy-go-lucky girl who was always making gimp bracelets and friendship bracelets. We actually had nothing in common except total respect for each other. But an angel, I was not. I’d often make cracks about how her mom probably picked Grenade’s name because of the crude way she was delivered.

Sticks & Stones May Break My Bones, But Names Will Never Hurt Me

Names also play an important role in the cosmetics industry. Lots of women (including myself) are suckers when it comes to buying products with punny names. Allow this nail-polish addict to provide examples: OPI: Eiffel for This Color and China Glaze: Kaleidoscope Him Out. Gotta give props to the creative teams who come up with the names.

Normally mascaras have standard, boring names like Blackest Black and some cheaper brands even just use numbers to differentiate between colours. Then you get companies who try to blow the lid off the compost bin. Yes, it’s all in fun (and I did get a laugh when I heard about most), but if you look deeper than the surface level, you’ve gotta wonder if these names are a bad influence or not.

When does being sassy begin to colour outside the lines and paint its way into anti-feminist territory? I’m definitely not a prude, but sometimes I ask myself if some shocking colour names are really necessary. Aren’t there other (and better) ways to get attention from consumers?

Sex sells:

We Don’t See Eye to Eye on Being Cheek to Cheek

I own China Glaze Tickle My Triangle. And I was thinking about buying Cheeky Monkey Brazen Hussy, but the more I think about, the more I feel like I shouldn’t be supporting a company that sexualizes women. It goes against my feminist ideals that I’m trying to uphold (even though I am, of course, still human and hypocritical at times).

Cheeky Monkey is a cosmetics brand that I didn’t know much about until last week, so I did some research. According to their website, the Cheeky Monkey philosophy is all about empowering women:

“Cheeky Monkey is not conventional.

Neither are the women who wear it.

We believe all women should feel free to express their personal edginess. You work hard, make responsible choices and embrace life to the fullest. Engage the cheeky side of things – you get the joke. You know that to be good, you have to be a little naughty. Cheeky Monkey cosmetics are environmentally safe and 3 Free healthy. They are edgy and fun, but above all, high quality. Just like the women who wear them.”

Sounds great, right? It makes women sound like the world is their oyster and that they have the freedom to change it. I don’t have any issue with that. My problem is that they’re saying one thing, but then doing another. We’re all hypocrites, and I’m certainly not one to stand on a pedestal to proclaim how morally superior I am, but c’mon…with a mission statement like that, how can they possibly justify nail-polish names like Cheap Whore and Back Alley Sally? Yes, they make us giggle, but what the hell is empowering about being a slut and being used for your body?

Cosmetic politics.

What do you think?

Getting Nailed: Bottling up Gender Stereotypes

FeminismGlockoma is just a newborn feminist blog. But with some TLC, I’ll help it grow strong enough to confront a circus of mature topics that’ll get your mind revolving like the Giant Ferris Wheel at the amusement park. I’ll burst your bubble and maybe I’ll even piss someone off.

Come fly with me on our way up, and let’s call out the scum of the Earth as we dip it low. Opinions run full circle without getting winded – I hope you can keep up.

Since the frequency of updates on my feminist blog have been lackluster, I’ve spent some time brainstorming what subjects I’d like to address in near-future posts. After a barrage of lighting bolts and some thunderstorms, I came up with a few.

Whetting Your Appetite for Upcoming Main Courses

  • Singled Out – Unfair negative views of single women compared to the positive image of your typical bachelor
  • Hairy Situations – Why does society expect women to be virtually hair-free when the majority of men flaunt their forests?
  • Pooping Plastic – Understanding the rise of plastic surgery & its lacerations on women’s long-term self-image
  • Sex Sells Sellouts – The unfortunate reliance on womanly wiles & the Casting Couch to climb the corporate ladder
  • Being Nice Is a Sign of Lacking Personality – Is this statement true? Does the modern woman really need to be mean & nasty?
  • A Wrinkle in Time – Investigating anti-aging products & the unreal search for the Fountain of Youth

GlockomaNow that I have your attention, let’s get on with the show. Curtains, up! Spotlight, on! Glocks in hand!

GlockomaThe first thing I want you to sink your teeth into is the Big Bad Beauty Industry. It huffs and it puffs…and it shamelessly perpetuates gender stereotypes with conniving marketing tactics!

This isn’t anything ground-breaking, but if we become more conscious of it when we view their commercials and print ads, maybe we won’t be so willing to take it quietly.

But it’s too vague and overwhelming to tackle the entire beauty industry – I need to pick apart one facet. How about nail polish? Can you get down with that?

My stash is now at over 150 bottles, and I’m always reading the latest blogs to find out what the next hot shit is. Needless to say, I’m pretty passionate about nail colour!

Would You Rather Raise a Fist or a ‘Pink’y in the Air?


Browse through your local beauty store or look online. Check out the spectrum of polishes available to you. You’ll have an overwhelming number of sheer nudes, traditional pretty pinks, a heaping pile of reds or burgundies, some flirty purples, and a few beautiful blues.

Now look for yellows, greens, and dark grays. Much harder, no? The message we’re getting here is that girls and women are “supposed to” like Mommy-dearest pinks, barely-there soft colours, and/or red sex-kitten hues.

Just like TV sitcoms try to jam gender roles down our throats, the nail-polish companies seem to want to push the sales of a clear set of hues they deem ‘feminine’. Reds and pinks are their favourites. While I have nothing against those colours, I do find it a major yawn fest to see the exact same boring pink/red released in so many new seasonal collections. We’ve seen it before! At least give it a twist like a matte finish or holo glitter!

What’s interesting to note is that ever since Sephora by OPI introduced the unique mushroomy stunner last fall that was Metro Chic, female consumers simply went ballistic! The average woman actually embraced this atypical colour. Even to this day, it keeps selling out, and you’ll find pathetic peddlers trying to milk the cash cow on eBay by auctioning off bottles for profit.

Since then, nailphiles everywhere have rushed out to get China Glaze’s green-glittery Emerald Sparkle, Essie’s surprising blue-creme Mesmerize, and OPI’s taupe You Don’t Know Jacques. Even shy violets took the plunge and reveled in those crazy summer neons like Essie’s Funky Limelight! (And c’mon, we’re all seriously lusting after the rare and discontinued dark-green Zulu by NARS.)

Oh, how it’s a sign of the times! I hope we continue to see an explosion of these non-traditional  colours season after season. Whatever the impetus was for the beauty industry doing a handstand and producing them is worth investigating.

Could it be that more women are getting tired of being force-fed gender stereotypes even when it comes to the makeup they choose to wear? Maybe modern women are flipping off the cosmetic companies and demanding originality.

Ahhh…It’s a good day for feminism!

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